Saturday, February 03, 2007
I have been rather down the last few days. I have been missing my cousin Rebecca and I wondered if I could have saved her life if I would have just listened a little closer. I went through the whole guilt thing and telling myself it was my fault. Last night I talked to our friend Tony and he has a lot of good things to say I broke down and cried but, I do not think he knew I was crying. I felt a release and just calm and I knew it was something I needed to do. I felt peace . I have decided to plant a tree in her memory I do not know what kind yet so I am doing some searching and hopefully I will find the perfect one. It was not my fault I could not have stopped it I don't think but, in things like these Someone feels the way I do and I think it must be somewhat normal. I will never know why she died at so young an age but I am grateful for the time I had with her. I miss her and I may always miss her, but she will always live in my memories.